Better a Better Time

Chapter five is still in progress, if you can believe it. Every time I think it’s wrapping up, it finds a new tangent to explore. I think that’s actually one of the things that has been slowing me down. There are the practical issues, sure — moving house, a less ideal working space, increased demands on my time — but I could work around those if I wanted. The real problem is that when I don’t know what I’m doing I go into heavy procrastination. The more frustrated I feel, the more detached I become and the harder it is for me to get into the right headspace. That struggle frustrates me all the more, and eventually I throw my hands up.

The solution there is to just notice the cycle, lean back, let it drain away, and actively try to place myself where I need to be. It will slip, many times — but meanwhile I will scrabble out a little text. And the more I do it, the easier it is to cling.

I think I’m also impatient. This chapter is sort of an intermission from the main story, and I left that on a cliffhanger just when I was getting into the material that I really want to write about. I don’t like the nonlinear approach, but the linear one is bogging me down. I need to chill and appreciate where I am and what I’m doing. This stuff is interesting and important too, and it will tie in later. Write in the moment.

While we’re here: revised word cloud.

Chapter 5

Erupted into teeth

Continuing from the previous post, word clouds for the first five chapters hint at the change in focus as the story progresses.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

So, work continues — albeit slowly. After a few big gaps I’m going to have to recalculate my timetable for this book and set new goals for myself. That’s a problem that I need to deal with; something gets in the way of a project, plans don’t work out, and so I shrug and meander and limply toy with the idea of picking it back up again. But shit happens; I need to just adapt. It’s time to get serious again.

On that note, big thanks to Kyle Maurer for his support. It’s all a-comin’! Don’t you fret.